There is one main thing I want to talk about, everything else is related. Ok expanding on what I said in my last entry regarding Ryan, I realize I do not just have an affinity for him, I am in fact in love with him. I am not talking about delusional, thinking the person is actually supposed to be with me, stalker love. I know he doesn't know me, I know he is married and I am very happy for him and Scarlett. I hope they have a great life together. I just happened to fall in love with him, even though he doesn't know me and most likely never will, even though it would be wonderful to meet him. Anyway, I'm sure some people think I don't really know how I feel, or even if I do know, I shouldn't waste my time falling in love with celebrities because they always put on acts during interviews or whatever. Believe me, first of all, Ryan doesn't put on acts, sometimes you can tell he is frustrated or doesn't like how things are going in interviews, that is understandable. However, even if you couldn't tell how someone is that way, I have seen enough commentaries, behind the scenes footage, dvd featurettes, to know what kind of person he is. Also, I think it's important to point out that I have never gotten to this point with any other celebrity. I have gotten many crushes, infatuations, and affinities, but I have never actually fallen in love.

Frankly, I don't know why I am even explaining this. No one reads my diary anyway (something I am actually glad about) and even if someone does, I really don't care what anyone else thinks. However, I'll finish my thoughts...

So, the point is, there is something about Ryan and something that I see in him that caused me to fall in love with him. I can't explain it more than that and I don't care to, I know how I feel and that's that.

Along those lines, I watched Smokin' Aces yesterday. Ryan is absolutely brilliant in that movie! The last few minutes of the film send chills down my spine (not because of what his character does, but because of Ryan's amazing acting job).

He is in a lot of movies where he plays similar roles, but he does an excellent job in all of those movies. However, in both Smokin' Aces and Amittyville (yes, I saw that too, it was really good, but I like SA the best), he is quite different from most of his characters. If anyone sees those movies and still thinks he can't act, they are either jealous, or a very poor judge of acting ability.

Ryan is seriously beyond amazing to me. And yes, I do realize he is a human being and that he is not perfect, that he makes mistakes, etc. that can be said for anyone, that doesn't mean you can't fall in love with them.

I am pretty much addicted to Ryan's eyes. They are hazel, an extremely beautiful color. I have hazel eyes, but not nearly as nice as Ryan's. They look almost dark brown in some lights, then copper in other lights, but when you see them in direct light, you see they are a very beautiful hazel.

It's kind of weird, I mean it doesn't feel weird being in love with Ryan, but what is weird is that with most people I've been in love with, I don't know if anyone else loves that person (though there have been some cases, such as with Danny), however in this case, someone loves him and he loves someone. I am glad.

That is all for now.